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Wednesday, September 03, 2008

The Unkindest Cut

If you haven't checked out Periodic Beauty Reviews just yet, then I would strongly encourage you to do so. The reason why I'll be revealing on Friday, but primarily because you'd miss something like this -- a small offhanded mention that my mom just got some cosmetic surgery done. And frankly, while it's personal for her, it's also personal for me. Does it get any more personal than our own faces?

Part of the reason why so many of my photos on the blog (check out my collage!) are in sunglasses are that I, like my mom, have bags under my eyes. And often I try to hide them under my glasses to a certain degree -- I particularly choose plastic frames instead of wired rims or "invisible" glasses. But, as you can see in these pictures from CupcakeCamp and the Total Beauty event in May, the bags are definitely there. (And no, I'm not just linking off to them so that you have to click through to see my eyebags -- the Flickr image is "all rights reserved", and I'm assuming the Total Beauty one is as well.)

You also can't really see it in the pictures (a little in the cupcake one), but I also have a vein running alongside the bottom of my right eye. Whenever I sit down in makeover chairs, the artists automatically grab their concealer and that's where they go first. For years, people have been asking me about it -- once even accusing Karen of punching me in the eye. ("What's with your eye? Did she hit you?") I can deflect attention away from it with my glasses, but obviously a major blood vessel in my face isn't going to go away.

A few months ago, my mom said she was going to get a consult on getting her eyes done. I raised my eyebrows and said, "Really?" "Just a consult," she said. But she brought home the brochures and eventually she decided that yes, she was going for it. And so two weeks ago, the day that we took Kati back to the airport after she came to visit, my mom went in for surgery.

I don't begrudge my mom for getting what she wanted to do done. But her line of reasoning was that le eyebags are genetic -- her father had them, she has (had) them, and so along those lines... those are my genes, too. (Mom: "I'm tired of looking exhausted all the time!" Me: "I am exhausted all the time!") No eye-depuffing product is going to make them go away, despite my products and my trying, but at the same time, I'm not going to take two weeks' worth of paid time off to lie in my bed with ice on my face after getting it cut open. I would rather take that money and that time and go to Paris (or Hawaii). I would not feel bad about my eyes if I were in Hawaii. (And honestly, on a day-to-day basis, I don't feel bad about my eyes anyway!)

So honestly, I don't know how I feel. My mom wanted them done, and she got them done, but I don't really think she needed it. And I don't think I need it or will need it or want it. It's just one of those things where my mom's addressing something that bothers her... that's also there in me.

I don't have a conclusion or a message or what have you, but this is something that's truly been staring me in the face and has been on my mind. Because beauty, above all, is personal.

images from periodicstyle.blogspot.com

1 comment:

Karen said...

Of course I punched you in the eye, duh, that is the only way girls can be friends these days! Abusive, abusive friends. I don't know if there's anything surgically to be done about that vein (what would they do, put an extra layer of skin over it?), does it make you that self-conscious?

I'm in the middle of a genetic eye-surgery thing as well, both my grandfather and aunt have had cataract surgery, grandpa and grandma on either side have ptosis--drooping eyelid. Now we're all sensitive about the eyelid drooping, my mom is thinking about getting the surgery done, too. What do they do to fix eyebags surgically, btw?

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